Double Trouble...

Bhaiyon dekho aisa hai ki raat k 2 baj rahe hain. Net aa nahi raha hai aur mere pass na to koi achcha serial hai dekhne ko na hi koi movie hai. To maine socha ki yahi kar lein (ji haan mujhe bilkul sharam nahi aati hai ye accept karte hue ki end-sem 2-3 din door hone par bhi hum log galti se bhi padhne ka naam nahi lete hain, jaise ab to rag-2 me besharmi bas gayi hai). To haan ji abhi tak mere se kafi logon ki kahani sun chuke hain hain. Of course sari meri hi zubani thi, aur koi option hi nahi hai na. Main jaanta hoon ki everyone would be eagerly waiting for their name to come. But wait some more. Abhi kafi log bache hain.

Achcha pahle main kuch aur soch raha tha, lekin maine socha ki ye page couples ko dedicate karte hain. Matlab aise 2 bande(ji haan aap fir se sahi hain, no bandiyan) jo ya to hamesha 1 saath rahte hain ya 1 jaisi harkatein karte ya is zamaane ne unhe rahne pe majboor kar diya hai. Whatever be the reason we are gonna hear about them now.

The Phodus :-

I know when i said "couples" u expected something lekin mere laga ki why do the obvious? Thoda tedha raasta lete hain. Haan ji bhai sahab, to now we are going to tell u about two geeks, and frankly speaking even bigger freaks. Ek 6-7 dino tak nahata nahi hai (main garmiyon ki baat kar raha hoon), dusra chahe naha leta ho lekin pahle se hi chipka rahta hai. Jab dono ko coding ka bukhaar chadhta hai tab to aap dekhiye kya nazara hota hai. Aur agar galti se aapne inhe ladte hue dekh liya, to meri baat maaniye zindagi bhar ladna chod denge (No they are not that brutal, they are so eewwwwww). Matlab thik hai bhaiyon lado, lekin yaar........main to bol bhi nahi sakta. Ji haan sahi jawab (lekin iske liye aapko thenga milega), main baat kar raha hoon The Great and Gigantic duo of Mota Haathi and Batista. Inko dekh kar 1 baat to zaroor yaad aati hai....SIZE DOES MATTER. Bhai lekin bade log hain yaar. And i really mean that. All jokes and satires aside (i can't believe i can do that) yes they are amazing in their own weird geeky way.

Anik bhai, chahe tumne Sanjeev sir ko bhula diya ho, lekin Sanjeev sir aaj bhi IIIT ki galiyon me tumhara naam pukarte hue paaye jate hain. Bhai is bande k bare me kya bolun. Kabhi-2 bahut irritate karta hai. Matlab ye aur iske principles. Mere ko to 1 baar pakka shak ho gaya tha ki HarishChandra k khandan ko belong karta hai. Master Coder, super dedicated, true to his words, and when it comes to exams...ruthless. Sala jaise mera negative nikaal k bhej diya ho bhagwaan ne. I know is bande ne almost sabse zyada logon ko pareshan, dukh aur gussa dilaya hoga, but i think somewhere in his own twisted world all those things were for a reason. And for that ---> SALUTE 2 u.

Same goes for this over-sized, over-working and totally weird guy named Aman (pata nahi sala iske mummy papa ne kaise socha ye naam....hai to bilkul ulta). Bhai mano ya na mano, ye banda nahi hota to sala adhe subjects me pass nahi ho pate apan log to. Hamara to syllabus hi Aman, Fugge aur TP k panel se pass hoke aata tha. Very joyous being, but excessively dirty. I mean WTF dude, kaise rahta hai. Bhai jo bhi ho bande ne kafiyon ki Naiyya paar lagayi hai. Aman bhai.....really a TRUE PHODU.

Chalo choti si chane ki jhad pe bahut upar tak chadha diya hai dono ko. Ab shayad thodi der tak dimaag na kharab karein. Haan bhai moving on.

Nange Bachche :-

Ab bhai title se hi samajh jao. Yahan aapko duniye k 2 aise praniyon ka vishleshan milne wala hai, jo sale ghar se aate to kapde leke hain, lekin hostel me aake lagta hai sabse bade bhikari ho gaye hain (or they belive that someone will surely notice their pornographic skills), pata nahi kya. Mutthu devta aur Circuit devi. (Ohh did i say devi....chalo chodo yaar kaun padhta hai itna deep me).

Mutthu 1 aisa prani hai jise kisi bhi prakar k pinjre me band karna mushkil hi nahi nammumkin hai. Is chakkar me kafi achche khase log iski hit-list me chadh chuke hain. Jis bande ne isko band karne ki koshish kari hai, ye unpe aisa chadhta hai ki bhai sab apni izzat ki rakhwali karne hi bhagte hain. In baaton pe yakeen nahi hota hai to poocho Kauwwe aur Sardar se. Lekin bhai jab kuch karne baithta hai to aisa lagta hai ki baki duniya ko aag bhi laga do to sale ko juun nahi rengegi. One in millions...main ise phi phodus me include karne wala tha....lekin iske vichitra karya-karini ko dekhte hue i decided otherwise. Bhai yaad zaroor rakhna yaar.

Apne circuit, inki kahani shuru hui 1 play se. Munna bhai chale gaye inhe chod gaye nangapan karne. Sala aisa lagta hai ki aise hi patthar k jaisa paida hua tha (by God yaar aunty ko bahut dard hua hoga). Thos sala. Upar se chipak jata hai yaar. Are matlab bas kar yaar. Sala achcha bachcha ban sakta tha, lekin mutthu ki sangati ne dimaag fira diya hai. Matlab atanki bana ghoomta hai. Haan cricket ka balla dikhao ise to kahin tak bhi tumhare peeche chal jayega. Beta tune Natoo ka career barbaad kiya tha, tujhe to aisi haye lagegi na ki paani nahi poochega. Bas sala 2 hi baar chala aur batsmen bolta hai apne ko. BHAK. Yaad aayegi re teri.

So my dear Ladies and Gentlemen, here is the moment that u all have been waiting for. This can be a very sensitive matter so i have to tread carefully.

The Ajans :-

Bhai inka naam sunte hi aisa lagta hai ki sala RGIIT k aadhe pointers to apne me baat k kha jate the. Usse bhi pet nahi bhara to AGE me bechare Guna, Gandhi, Bobbe aur Tidde ki bajate the. Fir sale CS me 1 ko maar do to pakke se tumhari maut pakki, doosra banda uski maut ka badla to lega hi. Ye bhi kam pada to sale Germany bhi ho liye. Matlab sharam haya ki to cheez hi nahi hai in dono me. Hamesha Vikram Betaal ki tarah ghoomte rahte hain, 1 doosre k kandhe pe latke hue. Lekin kuch bhi kaho, sale kaam bahut karte hain.

Pulkit Goyal naan ka jo prani hai na vo sala kahin se bhi mujhe is grah ka to lagta hi nahi hai. Alien hai pakke se, matlab jis cheez me haath dale vo cheez khatarnaak ho jati hai. 1st sem me top mara to logon ne socha ki chalo achcha hai, fir agle sem me bhi top maara. Age ka best player, CS ka one of the best player (agar yahan "one of the" nahi daalta to mera khoon kar dete kuch bande), aur na jaane kitne games khel rakhe hain. Sab sale padh rahe hote hain, iska aadhe time me course khatam ho jata hai aur usme se bhi adhe time games khel raha hota hai. Lekin sala pakata bahut hai. Isse baat karne pe aapko mehsoos hoga ki isme one-word answer system banne ki poori kabiliyat hai. Aisa lagta hai ki bhagwaan ne bol k bheja ho ki "Beta, jitna bologe utni hi zindagi kam hoti jayegi". Matlab bhai hadd hai. Lekin sala jaisa bhi hai jhakass fodu hai. Tere ko to best of luck bhi kya bolun bahi...bas lage rah.

Sapan mahashey ki tareef me chand shabd ab kya bolun. Bechara hai to achcha banda lekin uske sare efforts Pulkit k chakkar me over-shadow ho jate hain. Mere ko abhi tak yaad hai 3rd sem me dono k nine-pointers aaye the, to sab bol rahe the k bhai Pulkit to akele hi 18 poniter le aaya. Sapan ka muh dekhne layak tha. Lekin bhai jab "Yadi to" se bolna start karta hai na tab to samajh jao ki ab Sapan bhai lamba samjhayenge kuch. Best o fluck bhai for the future.

Haan bhai to ye thi kahani hamare campus k couples ki. Mere ko pata hai ki main kafi sare miss kar raha hoon, lekin yar sabke bare me to describe karna mushkil hi ho jayega na. Aur haan bhaiyon actually main ye post kal raat complete karna chahta tha, lekin unfortunately abhi complete kar pa raha hoon. Kal se aaj tak me kuch zyada changes nahi aaye hain. Bas yaar finally GST place ho gaya hai, aur ham logon ne Zero Knowledge Protocol ka achcha implementation karte hue ye dikha diya hai ki bina kuch jane bhi aap sare questiona kar sakte hain(talkin about the SMS Quiz). Chalo abhi k liye itna hi. Milte hain break k baad....